Friendships: BEAR with me

I have concluded that friendships people are complicated. Guilty as charged. Hahaha! I ranted on friendships in a personal blog and here’s a sneak of my drama:

“At the moment, I hate it. It’s tempting to stay out of it and live life on your own. But it is also inevitable. It is something to be kept and nurtured. It’s not something you drop all of a sudden simply because you’re tired of it or you were hurt or disappointed. It takes communication and understanding. It takes a great ton of humility (no matter how right you think you are) and a lot of perseverance. You shouldn’t leave people hanging whether they mean something to you or not.”

I do not own this photo

I’ve learned a lot about relationships nowadays, this year, it’s relationship with friends. Never have I ever been in a serious fight with my friends- kahit best friend. And never ako naging part ng group. I was always the lone type, hanging around with certain people but never really lasting in a clique. If I ever did join a group of friends, lagi akong neutral. Never too close, never too distant. Pretty much like the leech in the gang, feeding on their delicious company but an outcast nevertheless. (Yes, read this with a tone of self-pity).

But now that I regularly go out with this special group, I’ve experienced a constant relation between a ton of fun and a ton of drama. Directly proportional yan, Bes. You can’t have fun and expect to have no drama trailing along with it. I had to balance between being myself and respecting the person’s personality/attitude. Oo, lahat kayo mag-aadjust para sa isa’t isa. If there’s something you don’t like about the other, you tell them. Kung ganun talaga sila, ikaw mag-adjust. Unless, sobrang toxic na yung relationship niyo, that’s when you break it off. But not without proper communication and understanding.

“Bear with me” (I do not own this photo)

That’s why I entitled this post (notice the pun) “Friendships: BEAR with me” because whether we like it or not, nobody’s perfect. No matter how close you are to a person, they are bound to disappoint you. There is no “perfect” friend. It is your duty to bear with each other. Endure. Persevere. Hold on. Yes, it’s hard. It hurts. But bruh, you’re bound to miss that person no matter what stupidity they’ve done! haha

Let me tell you this, there’s a God out there and He wants to be your friend.

It’s a different story for everyone. I have my own, you have yours. Who am I to judge? But let me tell you this, there’s a God out there and He wants to be your friend. You might be a bit distant from him and who am I to blame you? I mean, He is God. A superior, perfect and holy being. Who are we to be called friend- even CHILD of God? But God became flesh. He became human. He reached out to us, lived, breathe, laughed and cried like we did. Remember when Jesus knew he was about to be betrayed by his close friend, Judas? He was so troubled that he asked his three disciples to stay awake and pray with him. But what did they do? They slept. And in the following chapters, Peter, disowned Jesus three times. Jesus’ best friend rejected him. You would think Jesus was disappointed. But what he said to his disciples will surprise you:

“… The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.” (Matt. 26:41) He understood their weakness. And yet again, they fell asleep. Saklap! But what did Jesus do? He died for them. He died for us. Grabe, tapos hindi ka lalapit kay Lord? Sinasabi mo na hindi ka karapat-dapat humarap kay God kasi ang dami mo nang ginawa na kasalanan. Oo, totoo yan. We’ve messed up BIG TIME. Hindi sapat ang pagiging “good” natin. But don’t you think that His death and resurrection was enough? What he did for all of us, is so that we will no longer be bound to sin and connect to God once more. But we distance ourselves from him. Whenever certain people disappoint us, whenever things don’t go our way, we blame our Father. 

God wants you to be close to him. He’s always there. He’s reaching out to you. Maybe you feel unworthy or perhaps, you think you’ve got it all under control. But one thing’s for sure, He loves us and he wants us to rely on Him. He’s that one friend who’s ready to bear with you.

Grace and peace. L.O.L ❤
-DAN.

God’s Got it Covered! || Dormitory Bible Study

Last week was our Bible study’s first monthsary! Praise God! I had the honors of sharing the word that day. But before that, I had to go through the burden of my anxious heart. Our midterm exams were being held on that very week and unfortunately for me, almost all our teachers forced to squish their subjects in a day. Talk about a tight schedule.

I told myself not to worry, I still had a week to prepare for the Bible study. “And you have just four days to study for your exams. Good luck with that.” my conscience retorted. Thank you for the support *eye roll* but even so, I placed my trust in God, reciting Philippians 4:13 in my head.

Surely enough, as I was reading my devotional that night, I felt a pang in my chest that this was the message I was to impart. Joy, awe and worry filled my little heart. I said to God, “Wow, that was quick! Thanks Lord!” and at the same time I thought “But how am I to deliver this message? This needs a lot of studying”  Time.. time. Precious time. I barely had time to even study for my exams! At this point, I was panicking inside. My heart felt worried but my mind told me to have faith. God’s got it all covered. So I let it go. But deep in my heart, I still held onto a teeny weeny bit of doubt.

Without much time left in my hands, I tried my best to manage it, being careful that I do things by the grace that God has given me and not by my own strength. I had to keep in mind that everything I did was for the Lord, and not for myself nor for anybody else. I wanted to be sure that I took the time to wait and listen well for God’s instructions, that I wouldn’t hurry everything up.

No matter how much I studied, there was always this thug in my heart telling me that I had to pray. Knowing that this feeling wouldn’t go away if I continued to ignore it, I prayed very fervently to God. I prayed that God would remove the burden in my heart and replace it with desire and passion to share His word. I also prayed that all my fears would go away, and that He’d guide and lead the things me. God reassured me with through His word and His promise that His holy spirit would speak through me (Matt. 10:20)

Four days had passed and it was time to take the exams. I don’t mean to boast, but everything was breezy! I answered the test papers with ease by the grace of God, my brothas! With that done, the Lord strengthened my faith. I finalized the message I was to impart, prayed and off I went to the Bible study with the feeling excitement and anxiousness (still) in my heart.

As I spoke, my voice and hands shook, and I was stuttering the words out- but one thing is certain… everything that came out of my mouth was from God. I couldn’t have said all those things much less speak.. But God had prepared me for this and He certainly fulfilled His promise. God removed the perfectionist in me and I spoke with passion.

Glory be to God!

Lotsa love! ❤

Journey of a Dorm Bible Study Group

Before college started, I’ve had this desire to start a Bible study at the university or at the dorm. It was a dream of mine to have fellowship with people of the same spirit and passion to know and share God. When college came, the school works and stress came along with it. The idea of starting a Bible study in the dorm vanished and I slowly forgot about it. But God had a different route in mind.

Just a week ago, one of my classmates, who happened to stay at our dorm as well, suggested to take up a Bible study in her room. She said that she’s been praying for some spiritual fellowship for a long time. I may have let go of that plan, but God hasn’t. To me, having my quiet time with Him everyday was enough (which sometimes doesn’t even push through because of the busyness). But God knew more. He knew I needed more discipline, encouragement, and spiritual growth through fellowship in His word and Spirit. My heart smiles at this because God cares so much about us. He will not allow to let us slip away that easily.

We held our first Bible study in our dorm at La Consolacion College in her small room that had just enough space for five people. There were three of us present, Shayne, Crystal, and I. We started with a short prayer, worship, then to the Word, sharing, and prayer requests. It was a great beginning! We were filled with joy and renewed passion for the Lord.

We plan to invite random people to our small group meeting and hopefully, there will be some who would be interested to join. It won’t be easy. There will be rejection, persecution, opposition and a lot of other things that might try to stop our plans. Not only that, but if the number of people in our Bible study grows, we would have to plan on changing our location to somewhere more spacious. We might attract some unwanted attention which may lead to the end of our dorm room Bible study. Our University and dormitory is a very religious community, so something that goes against their practice might alarm them. I doubt that meeting together to read the Bible goes against their religion, but there are still a few stories of Christian colleges shutting down small group meetings and comparing it to fraternities and sororities. Though we’re not yet in that situation- in fact, very far. It is good to prepare for when it might happen.

I’m just so amazed and psyched up about how quickly everything is coming to place! So I thank the Lord for this great opportunity to learn His word, grow closer to Him, and reach out to others and share God’s greatness to them. I was also slightly surprised that there were actually people who are as excited as I am for the Bible study.

There’s a lot to think about though. It’s easy to just plan a date and simply invite people and share the Word. But we should also contemplate about our motives, our mission, what is the goal of the group, and what does it hope to grow into or impart to it’s members. How do we plan to reach out to people? Will the dorm allow a small room organization to take place? So these are the few important things we’d have to discuss and ponder on before we start expanding our small group.

I can’t wait for the next session! Though I’m quite anxious as well ’cause I’ll be the next to lead the meeting. I know I shouldn’t, but I’ve always been conscious of what people might think of me when I speak in English (I stay in the Philippines and I’m not very fluent in Tagalog). Though it’s nothing I should worry about, it was always something that troubled me ever since I was a child. Anyway, I shouldn’t be worried about it because God’s got it all covered. He’s got everything all sorted out. I just have to do my part. And I’m pretty excited!

I’d love it if you guys lent your prayers for our Bible study to continue to run smoothly and along with the will of God. Thank you for all your prayers and support! Will be updating you all to how it went 😉

Lots of love and sprinkles of joy!

A Straight Path || College Talk

I would like to dedicate this post to my One and Only Beloved Jesus Christ who has been with me through everything. He never left me on my own. Through the joy, He’s there. Through the sorrow, He’s there. I just want to acknowledge His faithfulness and goodness in my life. He’s done a lot of things that is far too many to count. I’m so grateful for what He has done in me- no words can describe His majesty!

I’ve broken His heart countless of times and I am not worthy of His never-ending love, grace and mercy. I still find it amazing that He willingly chose to forget my sins and take me as I am. He who is God became flesh to die for my sins while I was still a sinner. Amazing…

The main message of this post is based on the Bible verse Proverbs 3:6 “in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight.” I believe that I am a living witness that God would keep His word. He certainly will make your paths straight and clear if you submit to Him and His perfect will.

When you enter your first year of college that is when the word CHANGE slaps you in the face. You will be met with different people who have different views and beliefs. You’ll have to adapt to your new environment, lifestyle, tight schedules, food choice, big responsibilities, etc. Our approach to these big changes is what determines how the rest of the year would be. You can’t stay afraid, shy, and reserved for long. We have to get out of our box. But we certainly can’t do it all on our own- I couldn’t. I’d be fooling myself if I said I did- so I surrendered it all to God. Multiple times actually.

I say that I “surrendered” multiple times because I never actually did let God take the wheel. I took it all upon myself. I’m one who likes to plan everything and if I don’t get it my way- it frustrates me. I learned that frustration is a sign that you are putting God in a box. It’s a sign that we’re trying to do things by our own strength. It’s a sign of pride and it’s a sign that you need God’s grace to help you.

“Grace is God’s power made available to us free of charge, enabling us to do with ease what we could never do on our own with any amount of struggle or effort.”

– Joyce Meyer

When I was searching for a University I remembered being so excited to plan everything in advance. Everything should be perfect! Sadly, my enthusiasm was cut short ’cause as time grew shorter and graduation came closer, I started to panic. Finding a University and searching for the right course suddenly became a burden. I started to get frustrated. I would cry every night, study until my eyes hurt, and worry about my future. But in the end, I always find myself going to God. What I should’ve done in the beginning.

God was telling me “My child, you’ve done your part well. Now let me do Mine.”

We’re partners with God. God has a part and we have a part. God won’t do our part and we can’t do His part.

…

God will do what we cannot do.

– Joyce Meyer

I started to lose hope in myself and somehow, that was a good thing because my hope went to God. I didn’t realize it then, but I was the fog that made the path unclear. I was the double-minded culprit who went to the crooked lane when I could’ve pushed my pride away and let God make my paths straight and clear the fog out of the way. That meant I had to get out of God’s way.

Once I finally let God handle my burdens, which He was willing to take, it felt like the weight was lifted off my shoulders. It wasn’t easy to let go because of my pride and stubborn attitude, but it’s actually very simple. Just do your part and you have to allow God to do His part. God won’t do His part if you don’t let him. Where’s the freedom in that?

The first year of college was and is a breeze for me. There were little bumps here and there, a little touch of sadness and tears, but God- BUT GOD changed my perspective of situations which changed the way I approached it which affects not only me but also the other people around me. I was filled with joy which I believe came from only GOD alone.

I tell you, He did so many things in my life and I believe, He would love to do great things in Your life as well, that is if you let Him. 😉

Glory be to God! ❤

 

I Am Yours- Lauren Daigle || Weekly Psalm

I’ve been so stressed and busy with a lot of workload filled with tons of home works and quizzes squeezed in such a tight schedule. Okay, maybe I’m exaggerating a bit- but this is totally accurate (I apologize for the contradictions of my words).

Our prelims exam is so near and I have no idea how I am going to study all these subjects! The night is going to be a long one… yes, I am going to stay up ’till morning. But I have to remember to ask myself these 2 very important questions… why am I doing what I’m doing? and Who is it am I doing this for?

And the answers should basically be, to glorify God and for God. I have to remember that I am for the Lord and for Him alone. And because I am His, I know for sure that He would never EVER fail me. Praise God! I can do all things through Christ- I claim it! I may stumble and fall, but You will always be there to rise me up. Thank You Lord 🙂

So I rest in Your promises
Now I am sure of this
I’m Yours.

No power is strong enough
To separate me from Your love
I’m Yours,

When Things Go Out of Control… God Will Make a Way || College, Life, & Change

College has honestly been stressful. Never have I studied this much in my life! Quizzes and home works here and there, and the last thing you’d want to happen is to get sick. Well guess what? I got sick… (-_-;) and that was a day before my midterm exam started. Perfect timing. Please take note of my sarcasm. Staying in a dorm apart from your family and having to decide, “Am I sick enough to go home and rest OR should I stay in and study?”, is a decision I struggled to make. I’ve never missed an exam when I was in high school nor did I ever experience getting sick in the Philippines away from my mom and dad. So this pretty panicked me a little. I called my relatives and they informed my parents and man, was my mom worried sick. So I went to the school clinic to get a check up- mom’s command. Based on the check-up, I didn’t have a fever, my temperature’s fine, I’m pretty much healthy. But I felt horrible. I probably lacked a lot of sleep/rest.

My family demanded me to go back home to rest. I contemplated on it and made the choice to go home. My head hurt too bad to study and I probably will get a fever if I didn’t get enough rest. When I got home I slept ALL DAY and boy, did it feel good to sleep. The next day, my lola (grandmother) and I went to the hospital to get another check-up (by the demands of my other worried-sick relatives) to figure out what meds I need to take and to ask for the opinion of the doctor, and for a medical certificate that I would need as proof for a reasonable excuse for being absent. My tita (aunt) told me that in their last visit, the doctor was a really grouchy man or how Filipinos would call it, mataray.

Will he even give me a medical certificate? I’m not even sick enough to get one. I thought to myself, worried.

My lola told me not to worry, she said she had already prayed for the doctor. When we entered the room, we weren’t met by a smile. As expected. But after a few minutes of talking, he suddenly smiled and even laughed! He started joking and we talked as if we were close friends. What a joy! hahaha

Me and my lola rode a tricycle back home and talked about how joyful the doctor actually was. The tricycle driver, who has known the doctor for a long time (through other patients), said that Doc was usually a grumpy man. Well,, God has His ways. I smiled and thought about at how awesome God is on the ride home.

Once I got everything checked, I have my meds, I have my medical certificate, I’m feeling good. Now, I should probably start studying for the exams that I’ve missed. But I guess, it wouldn’t hurt to eat a little… ooh they’re watching Annie 2014! Maybe I’ll watch for a few minutes.

~After an hour~

Ugh, my head hurt. I’ll sleep now.

Yup! you guessed it. Not one little bit of productivity. The next day, I went back to the dorm and made my way to school to get my readmission slip so I could take my special exams for free. Without the medical certificate- you’d have to pay to take the exams- and I missed 8 out of 11. Guess what? I left the medical certificate all the way back home in Magallanes, and my dorm is located in Manila, which is 2 hours away from each other- disregarding the traffic. Lord, what do I do? Let Your will be done, its out of my control now. I didn’t know what to do anymore. I started to sing “God Will Make a Way” out loud. I didn’t care what my dorm mates might think, I just needed to calm myself down and trust in God that He will make a way. Surprisingly, I wasn’t fazed by the situation. I knew deep inside of me, beyond my easily panicked heart, that God will make a way- it may not be easy- but I know God will bring me where He wills. And just so you know, God’s will is perfect and His plans are made to give me a hope and a future and not to harm me. Jeremiah 11:29 wooooh! haha

I texted my mom and she told me to go to Ma’am Odessa’s office. In case you guys haven’t read my older post, Ma’am Odessa is the woman we met in a local bus on our way to school from my hometown, Laguna. This is a big deal because mom and dad will go back to live in Dubai, and I’d have to be able to go to school alone- which isn’t exactly safe especially when your home is 2 hours away, and me being a dependent kid with no knowledge of the area doesn’t help one bit. Plus, Philippines isn’t exactly the safest place in the world. Anyway, surprisingly, Ma’am Odessa has been working in CEU (the university I’m currently studying in) for 25+ years! And now she’s became a close friend of ours and I am very thankful to God for bringing her and her family into our lives. What’s even more cool and lupet is that they’re a Christian family as well! Haha isn’t God so awesome!? So she’s the one who helped my get my readmission slip and medical certificate from the school. Everything went so smoothly that I forgot why I was worried in the first place.

I was able to take my exams. I struggled a little ’cause I barely studied- but I did try my best, and by the grace of God I got good grades 🙂

It may seem like a little problem, and it is… to God. But can you imagine? a big, extraordinary God will find the time to fix such a small problem for a sinful person like me?

Another hurdle I had to jump through is my anger and irritation to my theology teacher. I’m usually a nice and understanding person and I’m embarrassed to say this but, my blood coils at the sight of her. It makes me feel… un-Christian, if that makes sense. So yeah, I asked her if I could take the exam… she told me that I could after her class. The only problem is that I have a Math class after hers and I have to take an exam there as well.

“That’s your problem, not mine… you either take the exam or you don’t.” was her nerve-gutting reply. I resisted the urge to glare. And my oh my, I forgot to mention, she gave a project-quiz on the day of the exam- which I wasn’t informed of because I was sick. I asked her if I could take have a chance to do the assignment- she told me, It’s your responsibility for not being informed and asking your classmates. You have to accept the consequences.

Ugh, who announces an assignment on exam days? ヽ(ｏ`皿′ｏ)ﾉ << angry emoticon. And btw, I did inform one of my classmates that I was sick but I wasn’t informed of any homework! I really wanted to rip my hair off from the frustration I felt. She wouldn’t give me a chance to explain nor did she give me a chance to do that one assignment which was both a project and a quiz, which meant I could lose a lot of grades if I don’t pass it. Well how could I? She won’t give me a chance. What annoyed me more is that she kept of telling the whole class that, It’s a very simple assignment- sad to say, some of you are lazy and not responsible enough to do it. (；一_一)

That was it. I let my anger sink in and I couldn’t help but despise her with all my heart. My consciousness of this ugly feeling brought up another ugly feeling… guilt and shame. I cannot believe I got easily affected by this person. Yeah, I’m not doing anything bad to her- but I forgot to mention the part where I imagined grabbing her hair and screaming at her face. Yeap… I completely forgot of God’s love in a snap. I angrily stomped back to my dorm with a failing grade and an angry heart. I called my dad and told him the whole story, and praise the Lord for a wonderful, patient, understanding, and ever-loving daddy! He spoke kindly, gently rebuking my anger but with love and compassion. Which reminded me of how sad God must have felt when I cursed my teacher in my head. I asked my friends (the youth in our church back in Dubai) to pray for my anger and irritation, and that God would give me a loving and forgiving heart. Amazingly, just a few minutes to talking with my dad and my friends, my anger turned into love and joy! I was so amazed at how quickly God had answered our prayers!

In the midst of all our problems, we have to learn to love others just as God loves us. We should love even those we hate and despise… If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them. And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do that. Luke 6:32-33 

It’s not easy to love those you despise, I’ve just realized ahaha! But once you have experienced and felt how much God, Our Father loves you. It wouldn’t be hard to radiate that love to others.

I’ll end with the well-known, but easily forgotten Bible verse,

1 Corinthians 13:4-7

⁴ Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵ It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  ⁶ Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Praise God for everything! He really is alive and working in our lives today, you just have a stop and listen for His still, small voice. He’s there. Just be still and know that He is Lord. God bless you, my lovelies!

God’s Provision|| College, Life, and Change

If you’ve read my past post, then you must already have an idea of God’s great provision as I go along another chapter in my life. Being a very dependent and pampered person, and separating from my parents in a country that I have not been familiarized with is a scary thought.

But here I am! And let me tell you, though it may be a struggle physically, emotionally, spiritually, and believe it or not, linguistically as well (haha that’s another story), God made it seem so… easy (which it is for such a someone majestic like Him.)

By the way, I’m so sorry, in advance, if my sentences don’t seem to connect. I don’t know where to start and stories just seem to pop up out of no where haha :). God has done so many things, it’s just so overwhelming and I want to make sure I type it down to every single detail.

At school I was, unsurprisingly, surrounded by many oppositions and many different views and beliefs. Many people who argue about their opinions on homosexuality, sex, religion, and God. What I am really grateful for are the many Christian friends God had provided for me in the midst of all the opposition. I am surrounded by Christians ready to help, support, comfort, and guide me throughout my journey. God had everything all planned out! It’s just— dnfolaiefizdubcfze!!

Though there were many conflicts, I was surrounded by Christians ready to help, support, comfort, and guide me throughout my journey.

Starting from my flight home to the Philippines, (1) I had some of my classmates with me in the same plane! Which was both exciting and comforting to know. And when I enrolled into the University, (2) I was unexpectedly greeted by a familiar face… it was my school mate back in Dubai! We both were late enrollees, so we were considered international students, but even so we managed to have the same schedule. We were together most of the time haha! It was nice to have a familiar face in such an unfamiliar place. Ooh! that rhymes! 😀

Then there’s (3) Shayne, my best friend, dorm mate, AND classmate. A triple-blessing in one person. She was and is really such a great joy and blessing to be with. I didn’t make much friends at our class so I was glad that Shayne was willing to be with me. I never realized how much I really needed her. She helps me continue to become the joyful- and annoying person I am.

(4) Plus our two other roommates who are both super nice AND super duper fun to be with! Since they are a year older than Shayne and I, they helped us familiarize with the place and people along the way.

Then there’s (5) Bethany, a part of our youth ministry at our church in Dubai, who also studies at CEU (the University I currently study in).

(6) My mom also reconnected with my old childhood friend who studies in CEU as well and is in her 3rd year of studying as a proper dental student. I mean, how cool is that?! (7) And since I stay in a dorm, it’s very easy and safe to go to school. I also have the choice whether to go visit and sleep in my relatives’ house.

I’m not yet done haha! Remember in my last post when I was worried about finding a church? Well guess what? (8) I’m met with 3 churches. One that is an LRT ride away from my dorm and two that’s nearby my hometown. Isn’t that awesome? And everybody’s just so welcoming and the presence of the Lord is present and alive in each one of the churches.

In one of those 3 churches, (9) I’ve become close to, two very cool and awesome persons. Dheya and Kuya Chard. Yeah you guys haha! Thank You Lord for these two! They’ve become my prayer-buds and we would just pray for each other’s needs and remind each other of the goodness of the Lord.

(10) Then there’s the Requilme family who always makes me feel welcome and at home. Spoiled even! Bless them.

Now that everything’s all settled down, there’s still just one thing my mom continues to worry about and that is… transportation. Almost everybody knows how dangerous and unsafe Philippines can be, especially in Metro Manila, where CEU resides in. Moving back and forth from my dorm, to the house, to the church, can be physically exhausting but most of all, risky. Especially if I travel alone. (11) Here’s when God intervened… on our journey to school, we met three sisters. All three studied at CEU. One studies Nursing, the other Optometry, and the eldest, Dentistry. We got their numbers and they agreed to let me join them on the way to school.

Weeks passed by and classes got suspended more than once because of the heavy rain and strong wind. I decided to go home to Laguna, which is 2-3 hours away from the school. The day after that, school’s back. I had to wake up early once again and kick my butt up to school. My mom and I went up to the bus, and I chose the two empty seats closest to the entrance of the bus. Little did I know that right next to us were the three girls we met a few weeks ago. This time, they were with their mother. Mom looked for ways to start a conversation, and finally she spoke to their mom. And man, did she find out a lot of things. (12) Turns out, they are a Christian family and their mother has been working at CEU for 29 years. So she is very well known and well respected. And they agreed to help, teach, and guide me on how to travel on my own. Plus! they had a church nearby Laguna, and invited us to join them this Sunday. Praise the Lord! I’m just like– like– wow! Hahaha O how He loves me so ❤ Thank You Lord!

Aaaaand I’m still not done! If you’ve read my older post, I’ve mentioned having trouble finding friends. Though I have made friends, they just seemed like acquaintances to me. Most of them have already experienced smoking, drinking, parties- and I just felt so left out. I prayed to God to give me a friend at school who has the heart for Jesus… and yes, you guessed it! Going to number eleven in the countdown of God’s never-ending favor, grace, and blessings, (13) is a girl named Jennifer and a guy named Arjhay whose heart beats for Jesus. They managed to make friends with everybody and still stand strong to their faith and beliefs. They encourage and remind me to keep my integrity and faith at school. And can you believe it? I prayed for at least one Christian friend- and God gave me a lot more than what I asked for! I don’t want to seem like I’m over reacting or something. To some people, this is all just a coincidence, not such a big deal. You have no idea…

Oh! and let me add just one more- though there’s a lot more where the blessings came from- I would looove to thank God again and again for the 14th blessing… (14) Eloisa Gongon, my former online friend that I met from Wattpad and Facebook. We became close because of our love and hunger for God– and our craziness! Ahahaha! She studies in UE which is pretty much 15 minutes away from my University! Surprise surprise! Isn’t that awesooome? God’s presence is just around the place, surrounding me, and burning inside of me!

I can’t seem to get enough blessing from the Lord! Let me add the other blessings that brings me so much joy as well, like my good grades, the cats and other animals all over the place, the lightning and the rain (which brings me so much joy!), my comfy bed, and boooy there’s just too much! Thank You Lord! ❤

If you’re going through some financial problems, college dilemmas, or whatsoever, have NO FEAR because our God is always and always will be here by our side. Just surrender it all to Him. Let Him take the wheel.

I know it ain’t easy. I went through depression for months and months. But on the very same year, I received such great blessings and comfort from God. You see, I cried almost every night. I felt very distant from God. I deceived myself to believe that I had “surrendered” everything to Jesus but I was still carrying a few boxes of worry.

He doesn’t promise a smooth ride. In fact, you might have to go through rocky roads and steep hills. But God promised that we would reach the other side. Just trust in Him.”

And that’s what I did.

Luke 8:22
One day Jesus said to his disciples, “Let’s cross to the other side of the lake.” So they got into a boat and started out.

As you continue to verse 23, a great, big storm descended on the lake they sailed on. The disciples were frightened and freaking out! These disciples were expert fishermen, yet they were afraid. That shows just how strong the storm was. They finally called out for Jesus, who was fast asleep…

Luke 8:24
…He got up and rebuked the wind and the raging waters; the storm subsided, and all was calm.

In the end, they reached to the other side despite the huge storm.

Let us call unto Jesus. We can’t do this on our own. He’ll go with You through it all. Our great Savior, Healer, and Provider. Call unto Jesus.

God bless you, my lovelies ❤ Sprinkles of joy!

College & Updates on Life! ^^

Hey! I know its been a long time I haven’t posted anything and I deeply apologize. Life has been quite busy and quick and, in other words, dramatic and crazy. But God has definitely been good in my life. And by the way, I’m in college now! I enrolled at CEU, Manila taking Pre-Dentistry as my pre-med to become a proper dental student. So yeah, there are lots of ongoing changes in my life right now and surprisingly… I’ve been doing well, which makes me even more confident of the Bible verse, Philippines 4:13 “I can do all things THROUGH CHRIST who strengthens me.” and He very well did!

At the age of 15, being pampered and very, let me stress it again with bold and italic letters, very dependent on my parents, going back to my hometown to study and (hopefully) survive without their presence is very daunting to imagine. I mean, they’re only going to stay here for 1 month to guide me through, but then for the rest of the years (6 or more), I’ll be on my own. Then again, I’m not really on my own because, believe it or not, God had EVERYTHING planned out. From the flight home to my schooling and studies- everything was so perfect, even if we haven’t seen it laid out in front of our eyes, everything just comes to place right in the very moment. God provided for everything! Believe me.

Okay, so I haven’t told you this story (because I apparently haven’t updated you guys about anything- sorry about that), but I also enrolled to study in UST to take Nursing, which was a blurry choice of course for me to take- well so is dentistry- ANYWAY (going out of topic), I passed the exam ~ with flying colors! Haha kidding aside, I passed the exam but failed the interview. Which by the way, was held at Skype at Feb 14, 6am which was on Valentines day- isn’t that cool for my very first interview? I wasn’t so sad about not passing, and I trusted God that He had a better plan- but at that time, that was the ONLY school I enrolled in and basically, it would be considered late to enroll into any other school for that matter.

Long story short, I am now officially an Escolarian (what they call their students here at Centro Escolar University) and I am proud to be one! I stay in a dormitory with my 3 roommates, one of which includes my best friend, Shayne (who’s been my bud for 3 years). I can say that the dorm and the school is very secure and well managed. #blessed! And believe it or not but, college is fun and exciting… I’ve made new friends, this and that. AND I didn’t experience any cultural shock or any BIG changes, though externally there are quite many big changes in my life- but no doubt, my God has kept me stable. There are times when I feel out of place (or what we call, OP here in the Philippines), because most of the students are older than me and have already experienced drinking, smoking, and partying. But I’m totally fine with that- with all the things that the Lord has provided for me, I’m pretty sure that He will provide true friends as well 🙂 Another thing I’d like to address, is my need for familiarity. Though I didn’t experience any culture shock, the need for something or someone familiar constantly– how do you say this– it feels ouch and sad. Yeah, that’s how It feels. I just miss my friends, all my church-mates, my sibs, classmates, etc. I just miss them all. I miss Grayham as well (my rabbit), and the smell of the beach and the fresh air. No offense Philippines, but the air, if you haven’t noticed, smells polluted. Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE the Philippines, especially the people- and I do somehow prefer it over Dubai (don’t be too shocked), but it isn’t exactly the cleanest and safest country out there. And many would agree. To put it out more kindly, its a progressing country.

I haven’t found a church near the dorm yet, but I do attend a Christian church in Pacita which is probably an hour and a half away from the school. I don’t mind, as long as I get to attend the service. You have NO idea how important it is to have friends who will help you and guide you spiritually in your life. The fellowships we have at church is like no other get-togethers. They’re the ones who will encourage you and strengthen you in your journey. With this in mind, I started searching for small community churches near Mendiola while I was still abroad. I’m left with none at the moment. But then again, the Lord will provide.

My relationship with God is improving. I get to spend time with Him more than I did back in Dubai and I’m reminded of Him more as well. I feel very grateful and thankful for what He has done in my life this year. Most especially when I go to church on Sundays… I get overwhelmed and start to get teary eyed because- just because haha. I must admit, though I do take the time to read His word and pray every night, I never really savored it. Get me? I’m always either too tired or too stressed to actually just be in the moment with God. I’m always in a hurry reading the Bible, to finish one chapter just to ease myself from the conviction I get, “SPEND MORE TIME WITH GOD.”  No doubt, I need Him. College is a whole new level. More tests and quizzes. You’ve got the “tests of Faith” and the “Who Am I?” quiz. See what I did there? Haha! 😀 funny… funny…

There’s more where that came from and I’d love to tell you guys every single detail. Man, there’s a lot. But I’ve got to study for my quiz on Botany tomorrow. Hohoho God bless you, mah luvs! ^^

2015, A Year of…

I know I haven’t posted anything for a long time and its a bit weird to be randomly posting something that is… Random. I’ve been so busy with a lot of things and well, life has been a rollercoaster for me and I cant take it any other way but to accept it as that.

I can’t say that God hasn’t done anything in my life because in fact, He has done a lot of great things and wonderful things in this undeniably crazy life of mine. And well, I’ve been feeling a lot of feelings lately. Yeah that’s my intro haha! That’s why I say life’s been a rollercoaster.

I’ve been feeling a lot of depression, hurt, anxiety, but also a lot of joy, love, and happiness. And I love God for being with me through it all, though most of the time, I honestly never ask Him to- which I feel bad for because, you know, we should always let God be in everything we do, and in everything we do, do it for His glory.

The reason I’m saying all this is because 2015 is the year where I turn 16 and well, its supposed to be sweet (out of context!). 2015 is also a year where I make big decisions like, where should I go to college, should I study in Dubai? Or go back home in the Philippines? Should I take Nursing? Vet med? Dentistry? Med tech? I dont know. 2015 is going to be a year of change. A year of really BIG changes. My heart doesn’t know what to think of it, but thank goodness God gave me a mind! And God will use this wild brain of mine, to remind me that He will never change (Hebrews 13:8) He is the same yesterday, today, and forever. I take comfort in that.

BTW, its 3 AM in the morning and I woke up to catch myself thinking about love… Not the romantic kind, but the kind of love that Christ gave for us. That love. And I caught myself declaring in my mind, I love Shayne, I love Christine, I love Ariana, I love Jimaima, I love my sister, I love my mom and my daddy, etc… Man, I love everybody! And it hurts because I’m leaving half of everybody I love. (if you’re getting lost, which you probably are, I’m speaking about my family here in Dubai) Yeap… I’m going home, friends. Back home In the Philippines- but I’m actually not so sure about that. God may have other plans in mind (His ways and thoughts are higher than ours).

Anyway, love hurts- but its amazing! Especially the One True Love that only comes from Jesus. And I’m just so filled with it! I am certain, desperate, and hopeful, that 2015 will be a year overwhelmed, filled to the brim, and overflowing with Christ’s love. Because boy am I telling you, 2015 will be a different kind of rollercoaster. And all those other scary rollercoasters you’ve ridden? Pssh! They’re just there to prepare you for this bigger one up ahead. But this big, new, scary rollercoaster… cannot- and I stress, CANNOT, compare to our great, majestic, and Almighty God, Jesus Christ. 🙂

That’s my heart being poured out right now and I just can’t this out of my head. I hope you enjoy the musings of a 15 year old. Haha! Oh! and I hope and pray that you are blessed as well ^_^ it’s a such a wonderful day hihi (partly because exams are done, 100% because of Jesus).

I love you all! God bless you, my lovelies ❤ Stay in love and have a blessed 2015! Hays… I love you Lord!… Like sohper! (with Tita Precious’ accent)