Recently this week, I’ve noticed how careless I’m starting to become with my words. For example, when I get too excited about something I end up babbling and talking a lot, either to myself or to the person I’m with. Though that isn’t too extreme, I’m sad to say, that is not all- here’s where the disaster strikes in. There are times when I get irritated by something or someone and I tend speak out my feelings without thinking- yikes! Disaster. Often times, I catch myself making fun of other people thinking it’s funny and all- most of the time my friends think its funny.
But then I realized, look at what I’m turning into. And somehow, I’m doing all that just to fit in with the majority of people who makes fun of others. It’s tempting because almost all of them do it and you’d start joining in as well just so you don’t become a party pooper. Though I wouldn’t want to blame the people around me to be the cause of the way I speak, I believe it is true that they do have a part in influencing my mindset on my way of speaking.
Most of the people here in the Philippines are very bold and outspoken. Whatever strong opinion or belief it is they have in their mind, they are not afraid to speak it out. They also tend to be very straightforward though they do not intend to be rude. It may be seen as a negative trait, but I’d like to view it as something positive.
Sad to say, I’ve taken the negative side to it and I honestly don’t want to become that way. Sometimes we have this urges to talk back and come up with the greatest comeback to bring the person who shamed us down. I don’t want to talk back to a person who have hurt me. I don’t want to learn how to hurt them back. I want to learn to radiate the love of Jesus.
The good news to this little struggle of mine is the guidance and presence of God who helps me day by day not only through scriptures but also through my mistakes. God told me through a bible verse I read in my daily devotional, Romans 12:2 (NLT) that states,
“Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.”
Well isn’t this just perfect timing. And I like how it says that God will transform us because He doesn’t always change the situation we’re in, He would much rather spend His precious time carefully molding His children to be perfect and holy like He is.
But I guess that didn’t really sink in until my dormmates and I started to discuss about the rules we’d have to follow inside our room. One of the girls said that she remembered the time when Shayne and I were studying for our exams, both our roommates noticed that they were quite loud so they decided to leave the room for awhile- once they left the room they heard me shout “Thank goodness!” and got offended by it.
I honestly don’t remember that moment- but that just shows how careless I was. I told them I was sorry and they let it go, but the embarrassment of my action continued to sink in. That was when I realized that I have to learn to keep control of the things I say and learn to listen and understand more instead.
Man, it took that painfully awkward situation just for me to realize that I had to stop talking too much and be careful with the things I say. But it made me glad to know that God would allow that to happen so that I wouldn’t go farther than the mistake I’ve already done. He used my mistake to teach and discipline me.
I read another scripture James 1:19 “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry,”
That may be a challenge for me. I am one who is not only quick to speak, but one who is also very terrible at listening. I tend to doze off very easily no matter how hard I try and my mind starts thinking instead of listening. I am also known to talk a lot and I’ve always loved talking. And now here is a Bible verse telling me to be “quick to listen” and “slow to speak”. Two things I’m not very fond of doing. How in the world am I going to pull that off?
Naah why even ask that? I know God is faithful and loyal to me despite my problems. He will never give up on me. He will finish what He had started in me (Philippians 1:6) and I will hold on to His promise.